It has been six year sense this trip of daily pain
People accuse me of BS'n in my life
Who know nothing of my start
Being active and strong was my common place
Once you struggle to sleep and feel pain when you open heavy doors
Things change drastically before you can truly understand it
Opening a jar of Jam became too difficult and would often make me cry
Cold air from the AC can make shoulders shake and thighs quake
Every muscle gets tight, suffocated by nerves that know not how to react
Confused about what is going on, the crazy weather does not help
No one understands and just compares my pain to theirs
In 70 degree weather if the wind is blowing, I surely carry a sweater
Every restaurant I decide to go in, I pray that I am not frozen to death
While others laugh and enjoy their meal, I quiver in displeasure
Attempting to ignore the signs of my illness and not draw attention to myself
I hate lying EVERY SINGLE DAY about how I feel
Fabricating messages of happiness to attract people to me
Never wanting to shove away those who could possibly help
Ironically, they can only assist me if I am in a "good" mood
Being positive is important to people in higher places
So I am forced to lie in order to please you and gain what is needed
Or I will get it no other way
Bending over to kiss behinds, when I strain to get back into standing regularly
Jokes on me, egos are boosted and mine is walked over
Be humble, don't put your pain on display
It makes others feel comfortable and resembling joy
While I suffer in this glass hell that others put me in
Smiling on dates, when I want to grimace
What man wants to deal with my physical depletion
Mental disparities, when I pause out of necessity
I despise each initial description of what my skin feels like
In detail, giving the steps of my mental and emotional stagnation
It's not my fault, or maybe it is...
I know I did not ask for this, but you treat me as if I did
- D.Y.M. Original
Tuesday, July 3, 2018
My Position
Who do you think that you are?
You know nothing of me
Base my whole life off a social scene
Miss me with your nonsense
Tired of men claiming control of female minds
Where were you when I was an adolescence?
No damn place to be found
Ashamed of vulnerability that was never yours to hold
Speak my mind and men piss there pants
Tired of this trash
From the beginning of time women are told what to do
I'm tired of that objective
You are nothing and nobody to my independence and self love
Testimonies kept a secret for some bull sh*t family pride
When I needed you, I had none of you guys
Still go behind my back to invite tension in my life
I am over giving a F' about you our your pride
What the F' is blood, shed that liquid
It's only important when you do something HUGE
Still the same outcast used as a scapegoat
Overdue for facts and terrified by the judgement
Lucky for you, that is not my position
My place is known, coming into growth
Time has been passing by
The moment is finally near
Nothing to hear but conflict
Going to break every curse you ever placed on me
No word you say has power over me
Take me to another place, far from this disgrace
Disrupted by the sight of your face
Honestly the thought of your demise makes me smile
That is why I am only a part of the Supreme, and not ever all
- D.Y.M. Original
You know nothing of me
Base my whole life off a social scene
Miss me with your nonsense
Tired of men claiming control of female minds
Where were you when I was an adolescence?
No damn place to be found
Ashamed of vulnerability that was never yours to hold
Speak my mind and men piss there pants
Tired of this trash
From the beginning of time women are told what to do
I'm tired of that objective
You are nothing and nobody to my independence and self love
Testimonies kept a secret for some bull sh*t family pride
When I needed you, I had none of you guys
Still go behind my back to invite tension in my life
I am over giving a F' about you our your pride
What the F' is blood, shed that liquid
It's only important when you do something HUGE
Still the same outcast used as a scapegoat
Overdue for facts and terrified by the judgement
Lucky for you, that is not my position
My place is known, coming into growth
Time has been passing by
The moment is finally near
Nothing to hear but conflict
Going to break every curse you ever placed on me
No word you say has power over me
Take me to another place, far from this disgrace
Disrupted by the sight of your face
Honestly the thought of your demise makes me smile
That is why I am only a part of the Supreme, and not ever all
- D.Y.M. Original
Damn Sense
Damn these thoughts building up in minds
Unbound and dragged down into turmoil
I know nothing just like before
I am nothing without the Lord
Drilling into this life, gaining no depth
Stuck at a level that is to confusing to understand
There is no fuel to bother fixing this life
Change happens within, but nothing seems different
Gave all my heart, only small parts feel activated
Out of control, never had it to begin with
There must be no point to us going on
I'm trying to get through
Lost in you, in this, entertained by fools surrounding
Not sure if love lasts anymore
Existing in fables centuries old that every princess accepts
Damn! Get out of my head, penetrating my penial
Wishing there was an eraser
Keeping you here is my trouble
Unfortunate that I allow myself to loose all sensibility
No sure if any was around
Compression of each beat, too hard to breathe
Not seeing a point to this universe
Denying that it's about growth
Heart chokes... no voice to declare the truth
-D.Y.M. Original
Unbound and dragged down into turmoil
I know nothing just like before
I am nothing without the Lord
Drilling into this life, gaining no depth
Stuck at a level that is to confusing to understand
There is no fuel to bother fixing this life
Change happens within, but nothing seems different
Gave all my heart, only small parts feel activated
Out of control, never had it to begin with
There must be no point to us going on
I'm trying to get through
Lost in you, in this, entertained by fools surrounding
Not sure if love lasts anymore
Existing in fables centuries old that every princess accepts
Damn! Get out of my head, penetrating my penial
Wishing there was an eraser
Keeping you here is my trouble
Unfortunate that I allow myself to loose all sensibility
No sure if any was around
Compression of each beat, too hard to breathe
Not seeing a point to this universe
Denying that it's about growth
Heart chokes... no voice to declare the truth
-D.Y.M. Original
Sunday, July 1, 2018
Bunch of BS
Speaking in code so no one will figure out your life is a manipulation
Fabrications of live you have never seen or felt
Hundreds of stories under your belt and your running out of length
Speak towards life as though it is meaningless
Arrogance tangled into prideful annoyances
The simplest of breaths you make boil blood with lies of fire
Tormented by memories of victimization
Still you oppress me with your opinion as if it is the only one that matters
Wasted time listening to trash talk, pressured to accept it peacefully
There is no claim to your control levels here
Sanctuary does not encompass your mind
Assuming control over peoples lives when no one called you
Exhausting explanations of views that you assume should matter
Nothing of substance, don't have the time to try
Saying goodbye to incredible crimes against my character
You have no right to define someone whom you nothin of
- D.Y.M. Original
Fabrications of live you have never seen or felt
Hundreds of stories under your belt and your running out of length
Speak towards life as though it is meaningless
Arrogance tangled into prideful annoyances
The simplest of breaths you make boil blood with lies of fire
Tormented by memories of victimization
Still you oppress me with your opinion as if it is the only one that matters
Wasted time listening to trash talk, pressured to accept it peacefully
There is no claim to your control levels here
Sanctuary does not encompass your mind
Assuming control over peoples lives when no one called you
Exhausting explanations of views that you assume should matter
Nothing of substance, don't have the time to try
Saying goodbye to incredible crimes against my character
You have no right to define someone whom you nothin of
- D.Y.M. Original
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